Thursday, October 19, 2006
Love and Revelations
My hubby is the greatest guy I know, next to my stepdad. Rob read my blog and said he teared up b/c he felt pained by my pain. Nice to know he loves me enough to emphatize (sp) and not just sympathize (sp). Anyhoo, he said quit your job in May if you want and we will find a way to work it out. But then we started talking about the logistics of it, and I wasn't liking the picture. I don't want to sell the home we built, cancel our two week trip to Europe next summer, give up my scrap budget, and basically scale back our living. BOO to that. I also realized that I am scared of the unknown and scared to look for a new job. This tells me that I may want to quit, but I am not ready to quit. So I must learn to adapt to my situation and cope with the circumstances. I also realized yesterday that the things bothering me the most were the things I had no control over. So I spent the day today telling myself, "this is not worth getting upset over, this is beyond your control so let it go." My day wasn't peaches and cream, but it was markedly better. I can not save those who don't want to be saved, undue 15 years worth of bad habits, or rework the system, but I can learn to let go and only concentrate on what I can do and not what I can not. It is a very liberating thought indeed. It was exactly the revelation that I needed today.
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3 comments:
What a great hubby. If is so true that you can not save everyone, because everyone does not want to be saved. Just focus on those things that you can change. Hope you find the balance that you are looking for.
You do have a great hubby. I can empathize with you because my mother was a teacher for 34 years, so I remember her frustrations as a teacher. I have a hard time too as a nurse trying to change and wanting to change things that you can't. I hope that things get better for you. Keep praying and don't lose faith, God will show you the balance you need.
IT'S VERY EMBOWERING TO FIGURE THESE THINGS OUT. I ALSO WENT THRU IT. AS TIME GOES ON YOU WILL BE ABLE TO SAVE YOURSELF THE STRESS, AND JUST ASK THE QUESTION UP FRONT. IS THIS OUT OF MY CONTROL? I WISH ALL THE SCRAP GIRLS IN THE WORLD LIVED IN ONE STATE OF THEIR VERY OWN. IT WOULD BE SUCH A HAPPY PLACE. I'M GLAD I MET YOU!
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